In most of the utensil using world, grown men and women with no apparent physical limitations approach plates of spaghetti, fettuccine, and other long pastas with fork in one hand, large spoon in the other.
In Italy, only small children and those with small motor skill difficulties would place a spoon in opposition to the twirl of the fork.
I’ve queried many of my Roman, Milanese, and Calabrian friends on the subject. They all concur that it’s sort of like training wheels on a bicycle: once the child – or determined adult -gets the hang of snagging the right amount of pasta along with the required number of rotations, it’s time to drop the spoon and go solo with the fork.
If this just doesn’t work for you, then better to ask for a spoon that to use the knife to cut your spaghetti into little bite-size pieces, a serious infraction of Italian culinary laws at any age.
PLEASE NOTE: Practice sessions using the fork with a variety of incredibly delicious pasta dishes come free with every sign-up for my April 2012 tour to the Amalfi Coast and Rome.